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“I’m not much for inspirational addresses. I just wanta point out that every newspaper in the country has picked us to finish last. The local press thinks we’d save everybody a lot of time and trouble if we just went out and shot ourselves. Me, I like to waste sportswriters’ time so I’m for hangin’ around and seein’ if we can give all these guys a nice big shitburger to eat.”

- Lou Brown, Manager, Cleveland Indians – Major League (1989)

For some reason I imagine the Tampa Bay Rays’ 2008 season began with a similar quote. The Rays, as most know, were picked to finish if not last, barely above the Baltimore Orioles in the AL East. It seemed only Baseball Prospectus thought highly of them, picking them to finish somewhere in the 83 to 88-win range. I, personally, was a little less optimistic. I hoped for 81 wins, a .500 record.

But a funny thing happened on the way to October. To say I was pleasantly surprised by the 2008 Rays is an understatement. To say every fan I talked to was surprised would also be an understatement. Every new fan, every old fan. Everyone was shocked.

While this season has definitely been one for the ages for the Rays’ franchise, it has also meant a lot to me personally. Never before have I been so vested in a team. Never before was I so into every game – every pitch, every at bat, and every run. Never before have I been so involved. Maybe it was because the team seemed to want me as a fan, allowing fans to chat with both of the Rays’ General Managers. Maybe it was because I had a some money this year and could afford to go to Tropicana Field quite often, nearly 20-25 times, including the postseason. However, I probably watched or listened to nearly 100 other games. Again, hanging on every pitch and cheering every one.

When I was nine, I followed every game of the ’86 Mets, following as close as a 9-year old could. But it didn’t feel like this. When I was in my late 20s in 2003, I had a college roommate who was a huge Marlins fan (yes, they do exist). We watched as many games of that season as we could in sports bars, cheering and drinking our way through the Marlins postseason. But that didn’t feel like this either.

As many of my regular readers know, I have struggled with rooting for the Rays, penning numerous blogs disguised as love letters to my “long-distance love” a.k.a. the Mets. At first, I would say my interest in the Rays was strictly geographic. They are the local team, and I only live 30 minutes from the ballpark. I would have gone even if the team played poorly, as I did in 2007.

But after hearing Rays radio host Rich Herrera nearly choke up while closing the season broadcast, I’ve come to the conclusion that I am definitely a Rays fan. In his final broadcast, an emotional Herrera talked about how special the 2008 Rays were to him and thanked everyone involved with the team, from the players to the front office to the fans, both new and old, for giving us a magical 2008 baseball season.

I too would like to extend my thanks, although mine are a bit more personal.

I’d like to say thank you to the Tropicana Field ushers I often talked baseball with, and to the hardcore fans I saw in April and May (who were there probably long before that) who lead the cheers as the team got better, specifically those around my seat: the fans above home plate who chanted “left-right, left-right, sit down!” when an opponent struck out and the elderly gentleman who yelled “1 down, 26 more to go” after a Rays pitcher recorded the first out of the game.

Thanks also to the writers of Rays Index and DRays Bay for providing daily Rays-centric sports blogosphere insight, and most importantly, to the co-worker who was kind enough to let me buy some of his season tickets last December. Everyone listed, along with the aforementioned players, fans, announcers, and Rays employees, helped ignite a baseball passion in me that I hadn’t felt in a long time.

This 2008 season might be the Rays’ equivalent to the 1969 Mets, it may be a watershed year that creates an explosion of loyal, committed, die-hard fans. It may be the Rays’ version of 1991, the year the Braves lost the World Series, but began a decade of division dominance. Or, as unlikely as it could be, the Rays could be a flash in the pan, the second coming of the 2007 Colorado Rockies. Next year, the Red Sox and Yankees could decide enough is enough, open up the coffers, and buy themselves another World Championship.

Whatever happens, however, I know that even though I have been a Mets fan for over 20 years and that will never change, I am proud to also call myself a fan of the Tampa Bay Rays.

(Yes, the title of this post is a line from Motley Crue’s “Girls, Girls, Girls” [at the 3:05 mark of the video]. According to Google, no one has ever used that line in a Rays’ post before.)

Last year, Darren Rovell of CNBC.com’s SportsBiz discussed his concern over a WWE storyline that featured the death of WWE CEO Vince McMahon. According to Rovell, using such serious overtones in a storyline involving someone integral to the organization could have unexpected consequences. In the McMahon case, Rovell believed that perhaps investors might take the storyline seriously and pull their money out of WWE.

At the time, I disagreed with Rovell. It’s just a storyline, I rebutted. No story can go too far. It is absolutely impossible for the fabricated world of professional wrestling to impede on reality. No one takes pro wrestling that seriously.

I may just have to change my tune.

According to a recent press release by independent wrestling promoter Shannon Rose, American Pro Wrestling tag team The Heartbreak Express (Sean and Phil Davis) caused an international incident in The Republic of Panama this past weekend. Rose’s release states that the two wrestlers “took the flag of Panama and threw it on the ground and stomped on it” on “The Republic of Panama’s most watched morning television show, TU MAÑANA, in front of an estimated 5 million viewers”. Unfortunately, no YouTube clip exists of the incident.

Rose further claims all of the Republic of Panama is in a tiff over the actions of the Heartbreak Express. According to the report, the US Embassy has been contacted and Panamanian officials are demanding the Heartbreak Express “have their passports revoked and be banned from returning to the country”. Also, the President of Panama, the Chancellor of Panama, and the leading candidate to be the next president of Panama have all promised to punish the wrestlers.

This may be a first. Not since SGT Slaughter aligned himself with Saddam Hussein in 1991 has pro wrestling potentially caused this much international turmoil.

(Note: check out this link. Apparently, Robert Remus, aka SGT Slaughter, received death threats for “allying” with the Iraqis. And he was also supposed to burn an American flag in the ring but instead settled for a Hulkamania poster.)

Now could Shannon Rose’s press release be part of a marketing ploy? Could he just be drumming up promotion for an independent wrestling federation? Adam Lash of indywrestlingnews.com may think so. In a recent post on his site, Lash attempts to follow up on Rose’s report only to find no additional details.

Surely, if an antic on national TV caused so much turmoil it would have to be reported somewhere, right? Especially if the president of a nation is getting involved.

The question remains, however, what part, if any, is true? Did the Heartbreak Express go to Panama? Did they disgrace a Panamanian flag? Was there a reaction? Or is the entire incident a creation of the mind of Shannon Rose?

As an outsider observer, unfortunately, I don’t know what to think. From the SGT Slaughter incident, I know people are smart enough to not burn an American flag as a gimmick, but I am not too sure about a foreign flag. I would like to think they would hold that sacred as well.

That’s why, if this is not true, I don’t think Shannon Rose did a very good job with this storyline. As a promotional tactic, it is too ambiguous. Like the McMahon death angle, the idea that perhaps the Panamanian government could be after the wrestlers in the Heartbreak Express is too real and doesn’t leave enough of an escape into fantasy.

This baseball season I was on the receiving end of 97 free doughnuts, one for every Rays win, and a whole bunch of free Papa John’s Pizza, one for every time the Rays struck out 10 or more opponents in a game.

Thanks to Jason Bartlett and Taco Bell, the entire nation is now the recipient of the Rays’ generosity. So now lunch this Tuesday is also free. You better believe I’ll wait a few hours to get a free taco, although the boss might not be too happy. Maybe I’ll bring him one.

Word on the street is that the free stuff doesn’t end with the close of baseball season. With the rumored release of Guns’N'Roses’ long-awaited Chinese Democracy on November 25th (finally!), Dr Pepper has decided to make true on it’s promise to give everyone in America a free can of Dr Pepper in conjunction with the GnR release.

So that’s doughnuts, pizza, tacos, and Dr Pepper. All for the perfect price: Free.

And everyone wonders why America is overweight. Free water and wheat thins are so boring.

Wow. I never thought I would see the day I would be at the World Series. What began earlier this season as an investment in seeing some baseball has turned into one of the greatest rides as a fan I have ever been on. Unfortunately, it ends here, as my finances won’t allow me to go to any more games. Until next spring, of course.

(Update: as Anonymous hinted at, I didn’t go to the game alone – I brought my dad. Some father-son bonding at the ballpark. Hmmm, I wonder who Anonymous was?)

Dearly Beloved,

History has taught us that no nation withstands the test of time. The past is littered with the remnants of empires, kingdoms, and monarchies that thought they would last forever. Whether they stood for as long as the Roman Empire or fell as quickly as the William Harrison Administration, no nation’s reign is eternal.

This, my friends, brings us to fall of the Red Sox Nation. Today we bury the 2008 Red Sox, who put a great battle, but like all ancient empires, was doomed to extinction by a younger, more energetic, more modern adversary.

The reign of the 2008 Red Sox is not one of disappointment, however. They fought valiantly to keep their title. The denizens of the Nation defended their turf through tooth and nail, preaching the gospel to all who would listen.

Finally, however, their rule was too much to bear. Like many revolutions, the overthrow of the 2008 Red Sox Nation was caused from within. As the guardians of the past stood by, their Nation was toppled by the youth gone wild. For those who say the younger generation are unable to move themselves to glory, take heed. Lessons can be learned from the 2008 Red Sox.

So what now for the 2008 Red Sox? Are they destined to be the last vanguard of the Reign of the Nation? Did the Nation fall on their watch?

I believe the future holds a story yet to be told. I don’t think the Nation is gone forever. I believe they will be back, that while the best of their following will put up the good fight, the worst of their cultish followers will again harp us with churlish behavior. The thing to watch, however, will be how they respond to the youth. Will they recruit their own youthful army, or will they resort to the past failed ways of mercenaries and bounty hunters, those whose personalities will trade team glory for the success of self?

Such dilemmas face the future of Red Sox Nation. But for now, may they rest in peace.

Presidental candidate Barack Obama made waves the other day during a visit to Tampa when he said he would “show love” to the Rays during the World Series.

According to earlier reports, he also said he would root for the Phillies.

Oy.

This follows vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin’s pandering to the same Tampa Bay area sports fans and the Boston sports fans when she said both voting blocs “know a little something about turning an underdog into a victor.”

Not to pick on Gov. Palin, but last month reports surfaced that she also claimed to be a Pittsburgh Steelers fan and then later a Seattle Seahawks fan.

Although a presidential candidate or a politician in general who doesn’t like sports at all might worry me, why do candidates do this? The obvious answer is to get, in pro wrestling parlance, a “cheap pop“. But honestly, the chance for embarrassment is too great when you bring sports into politics.

Unless a candidate panders to everyone.

If a candidate is going to preach “going across the aisle” or “bringing people together”, why not root for every team? Why not make a mockery of the idea that sports endorsement equals votes, or that the inability to pick a favorite team would automatically disqualify a candidate? Why not poke fun at anyone who thinks flip-flopping in the stands is the same as flip-flopping in the Oval Office? Why not go to Chicago and root for the Cubs and the next day go to St. Louis and root for the Cardinals? Or better yet, root for Ohio State and Michigan.

I would also be all for a candidate who admitted being a fan of a particular player, no matter where that player went. If a candidate was a Johnny Damon fan, for example, then it would be great to see him or her in a Yankee cap and a Red Sox cap. Or an A’s hat. Or a Royals hat.

What about the candidate who had his or her favorite team move? It is entirely possible that John McCain could have been a huge Brooklyn Dodger fan who stopped rooting for any particular team after 1958. How would he win the “sports vote” if he claimed he liked all the players? What about being “a fan of the sport”?

And what happens when we get our first candidate raised on the X Games? One who has no opinion on the World Series, the Super Bowl, the Stanley Cup, or the NBA Championship? What if we have a president who doesn’t know how to throw a ball? How would he or she throw out a first pitch? What about the president who doesn’t care to have major sports teams visit him (or her) in the White House? If a president stopped that tradition, would anyone really care?

I’m not saying politicians shouldn’t have favorite teams. They are human, just like you and me (although I doubt many of them have ever sat in the nose bleed seats). I’m just saying please stop pandering to fans. Aren’t there more important issues to discuss?

Continuing the Sports/Politics theme …

Thanks to Global Voices Online, I recently found a very interesting blog. Özgür Dirim Özkan, an anthropologist living in Sarajevo, has been writing a blog entitled Bosnian Football Culture. A football (soccer) fan, Özkan has decided to combined his sports interest with his academic field in a nation still recovering from last decade’s disastrous civil war. For anyone interested in sports, politics, anthropology, or conflict resolution, Özkan’s blog makes for a really good read.

In his most recent post, “Bosnian Surprise for Turkey“, Özkan discusses the problems facing the Bosnian National Football Team in their 2010 FIFA match-up against neighboring Turkey. Among these problems is a lack of integration among the many Bosnian nationalities. Bosnian Serbs, Croats, and Muslims all play on different teams and have since the war. This of course, divides the fan base and hinders fan loyalty to the national brand.

Özkan also discusses the coach who yearns to bring the nation together on the field, the players chosen, and the fans who are being told to put their occasional loyalty to Turkey aside and pour their hearts into their Bosnian team.

Go check it out: Bosnian Surprise For Turkey.

We are only about two and a half hours from Game 7 of the ALCS. As the world prepares to cheer on the Rays, I have an interesting question for everyone.

What would you rather have: your favorite sports team win their championship for four straight years or your pick for president win the election?

(Note: I can’t stand the idea that politics is a sport. It’s not. It’s based on compromise. Sports is black and white. Politics in a democracy should be the sharing of power by members determined by the people. Unfortunately, that’s not the case anymore. Politics has become the ultimate nation-wide sport – “we’re winning this state” – “he is up by five points” – “we won”. It’s all rather depressing. End rant.)

Although having a presidential candidate win might prove that your opinion of the future direction of the country is the majority, the efforts of your presidential pick could easily be thwarted post-election by a stubborn Congress. Hence, your victory becomes more of a frustration.

Having your favorite sports team dominate for four years, however, means they are the champions. No one can dispute it, block it, filibuster it, disrupt it, or otherwise ruin your reign.

So what will it be? Your favorite sports team winning four straight championships or your presidential pick being voted into office?

And would you sacrifice the chances of one for the chances of the other?

Unfortunate Update: Due to a federal investigation, the Pimp of the Year vote has been taken offline. Whether or not this will be temporary remains to be seen. Rumors are abound as to the cause of the collapse.

Initial reports have claimed the Bourbon Street Mafia threatened to break the kneecaps of anyone who did not support them. Other reports claimed the Rated R Afro Star gave candy cigarettes to kids so they would vote for him. Yet a third report claimed the mysterious Gargoyle, who was in the lead, was affiliated with a group called People Overruling Polls Conquering Old-fashioned Regular Norms (POPCORN). POPCORN supposedly found Bigfoot and the Yeti and had them vote for the Gargoyle against their will.

As I hear more I will be sure to let my readers know. In the meantime, swing by the Afro-Squad website. Maybe they’ll have it fixed. Maybe once it’s fixed I can win fair and square.

Dearly beloved,

Today we are gathered to mourn only one soul. For we are almost down to our sole survivor. Each of the remaining souls hold a special place in the Kingdom of the Great Creator Doubleday. Although there is no doubt history will be kind to the survivor, our last remaining burials carry with them the chronical of accomplishment, of pride, of triumphs, of followings that leave disappointed, but with the hope that with a few breaks life will joyous in the near future. For we don’t so much mourn the demise of the final few, we instead celebrate their lives.

Today we say good-bye to the 2008 Los Angeles Dodgers, the heroes of Chavez Ravine.

In early days, when you were first born, you were the definition of hope. You lured the brain power of the last dynasty to man your reigns. Your field general was rejuvenated by the California sun, the sunshine, and the grass shakes.

Alas things did not go as planned. The snakes from the desert held you back and strangled your aspirations of glory. You were mired in mediocrity with no hope of salvation.

Then arrived a Savior.

Exiled from his home, the Savior worked and worked, elevating you to higher standing. You were the potential everyone saw in you. You had youthful exuberance, the savvy of experience, and now, with the Savior by your side, you had the excitement of the masses.

You entered the tournament of champions and firstly eliminated a much favorited foe. Unfortunately, the tables of fate turned however, and failure reared its ugly head.

Now you are gone and your Savior may be as well. Your future is very much in limbo as you must re-decide your fate. Whatever tomorrow brings, today may you rest in peace.